The topic of women’s bodies has been widely discussed throughout history. In today’s timeline, mothers are often scrutinized or even “demonized.” Recently, there has been a wave of criticism towards women who choose to have a family. Many claim that bringing children into this world is considered selfish. On the other hand, there is a well-known past of judgment towards women who decide not to have children, as it challenges traditional gender roles. The question is, what are women supposed to do when society ridicules them regardless of the path they take?  

The thought of women not having children has always been a topic of discussion. Women who choose not to have children have been referred to as “crazy cat ladies.” This has been a label that has been put on women for centuries. In ancient Egypt, cats were deeply honored and considered companions. Over the centuries, cats adopted negative symbolism associated with witchcraft, creating a new stereotype for women who were accompanied by them. These women were seen as evil and demonic as they were accused of using cats to cast spells, which would eventually lead to their condemnation. The phrase has been modified to express the “loneliness” unmarried women experience, reflecting an assumption that they need to rely on an animal for companionship.

In a 2021 interview with Fox News, the Vice President, JD Vance, made comments about the former Vice President, Kamala Harris. JD Vance claimed that Harris was a “childless cat lady.” He claimed that this country has become an oligarchy run by democrats, stating “cat ladies” are making the country “miserable” as well. This isn’t the first time someone has been labeled miserable for the simple fact that they choose not to have children. Childfree women have endured marginalization and stereotypes about their character as society tries to push a pronatalist agenda onto them.

When someone as important as the Vice President, Kamala Harris, is attacked and torn apart like this, it reminds women how society has chased them and will continue to do so, no matter the success. It is important for women not to feel encapsulated by this. Women like Florence Nightingale, Susan B. Anthony, Jane Austen, Frida Kahlo, Betty White, and Oprah Winfrey, who chose not to have children, have made a lasting impact, and their contributions have challenged the meaning of women’s success. It is not about forming a family but about making a difference and making other women feel represented.

For a long time in society, women have been expected to follow the role of motherhood. In present times, many women have fought against these societal norms, while some women find a calling to be a mother. When women choose the route of being a mom, they’re unable to escape the scrutiny that comes with it. This stems from societal expectations and how the narrative is written in the media. Even when motherhood can be celebrated, many women who decide they want to participate in motherhood are still shamed and judged.

After giving birth, mothers are expected to be “perfect” in every aspect, from the way they handle tasks to how they raise their children. Mothers are judged and blamed for every action their child takes. For example, mothers have recalled being judged for how they’ve reacted when their child gave a public outburst. While living in a society that expects the best from mothers, this causes people to forget that fathers also have a role as parents. At times, mothers feel they can’t satisfy others regardless of the route they take in their parenting. In many ways, parenting has been oversimplified. People don’t recognize how hard it is to be a mother, especially with the pressure of expectations. Mothers can not always be emotionally available. They, too, get tired, sad, anxious, or even depressed, but these qualities are attributed to “imperfect” mothers. In truth, whatever mothers decide to do, there will always be someone who disapproves. This someone can be a close family member, a friend, or even another woman. 

Even in the media, mothers are not safe from scrutiny and criticism. On various social media apps, people have commented on how they see motherhood. Under a TikTok post of women stating that people only associate them with being a mom, commenters were quick to criticize these mothers. For example, one comment read, “This is sad.” Even though the women claimed to be happy to be the mothers of their children. Another instance of motherhood being attacked came from the pop star Chappell Roan. In a podcast, “Call Her Daddy,” hosted by Alex Cooper, Roan stated the following: “All of my friends who have kids are in hell.” These words from Roan offended many mothers; some even came out to hit back at Roan’s words by stating the opposite, that motherhood has only brought them joy. While others in defense of the popstar stated that people are reading too much into her words.

In the end, women can’t seem to win no matter what they decide to do for themselves. Whether women decide to be mothers or not, criticism and judgment will always follow them. With patriarchal systems in place, women’s choices about what they get to do with their bodies are rigid. As a society, we must seek change for the expectations that are put on women and the impact it brings. To do this, society must address these barriers and acknowledge that there are different paths in life rather than just the norms imposed. Women should have the right to individual choice and be able to pursue the path that makes them happy.